The background, and the current goal.

One year and three months ago, I became a parent.  I took a one year leave of absence from my job as a teacher, but did not return when the leave ended.  I choose to be at home with my daughter for these first, precious, irretrievable years.  It's not a choice I have regretted even once, but one I am extremely grateful to have been in the position to make.  Because the dominant culture of the United States does not make it easy for a parent to stay at home.  Nor does the dominate culture validate this as one of the best gifts one can give to one's child and to the future of society as a whole (I think this is tragically shortsighted of us).  Our society is no longer structured around family and extended family.  Our support networks are institutionalized...and remote...and often dysfunctional.

So I've set out to find the village.  The informal community of people who will be my support (and I their's) as our children grow up together.  So far things are going well.  I started a weekly play group at my house when my daughter was six months old.  Some lovely people who barely knew me were brave enough to show up, and we became friends.  I joined first a Meetup and then a Facebook group of parents and started meeting them in person at parks.  Our children play together, we talk, it is lovely.  Now I'm teaching a Spanish class at my house to this same group of people.

Time has passed and things are easier than they were in those first bleary-eyed, sleep-deprived months of parenthood.  My daughter is 15 months old,  and I have begun to find that I do still (again?) exist as a being separate from her - with my own desires and aspirations.  To that end, I have started a Master's program; and I have found that I need some time to myself.  So my next goal is to find the childcare within the village.  The informal give and take that will allow me to study, and (dare I dream?) sip a cup of tea in peace every once in a while.  This blog aims to document my progress towards this goal over the next eight weeks.  Here's what we have so far:

I've created a Google doc which includes a calendar page for the month of September and instructions about how to ask for childcare (post in red), and how to answer another's request for childcare (post in green and change the red to black).  I've shared this with three other mamas whom I know fairly well, who are willing to give it a spin.  So far this month one session of childcare has been provided and two others have been planned.  One member cannot figure out how to edit the doc on her phone, another is on vacation.  But it's a start.  Once we get the bugs worked out we aim to invite a few other families to join our 'childcare swap' group, to expand the likelihood that we'll all be able to get the childcare we need, and give it return.  We're not looking to count hours or be exact, and we understand that childcare is not a guarantee through this group - it could happen that no one is available when I was hoping they would be, and that's ok.  But for the third of the month, I'd say we're off to a pretty decent start.